A 30-year-old Indian-origin woman committed suicide in Queens, New York, accusing her husband and in-laws of domestic violence. In a heart-breaking video, the woman, identified as Mandeep Kaur, narrated her ordeal and said “they compelled me to die.”
Citing years of abuse by her husband “for giving birth only to daughters,” her last message says: “I tolerated all of it, hoping that he will mend his ways one day.” The now viral video has sparked off anger about stigmas in the community. “It’s been eight years; I cannot take daily beatings now,” the mother of two daughters — aged 6 and 4 — says repeatedly, weeping. Speaking in Punjabi, she accuses her husband and in-laws of “forcing” her to die by suicide. “Daddy, I am going to die, please forgive me.”
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She committed suicide on August 4, according to her UP-based family. Her father, Jaspal Singh, has filed a case of suicide abetment at the area police station in UP against the husband, who is in the US, and his parents, who live in India. “We want our granddaughters to be safe now. They’re still with their father,” he added.
The Indian consulate in New York has promised help. In a tweet, the Embassy wrote, “We are deeply saddened by the death of Mandeep Kaur in Queens, New York, under most tragic circumstances. We are in touch with the US authorities at Federal and local level as well as the community. We stand ready to render all assistance
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From different villages in UP’s Bijnor, Mandeep Kaur and Ranjodhbeer Singh Sandhu’s marriage was arranged in 2015. Her family said he worked in the US as a trucker and she joined him three years later. There was no reaction yet from the husband or his family — some of whom live in India — and no information about specific legal action against them.
Kaur’s family in Bijnor said they had hoped the abuse would end someday. “We intervened once, and even went to the police in New York with a video of him beating her,” the father said, “But she told us to step back and reconciled with him. She said she was worried about the future of her daughters.” Now the family has sought the government’s help to bring her body to India.
Several videos of the husband apparently abusing her have gone viral, including one in which the daughters are heard screaming: “Papa, na maaro mamma nu (Papa, don’t hit mom).” In another, recorded in a security camera inside the house, she tries to stand up for herself — “I refuse to take it anymore” — but he beats her until she gasps out an apology.
In the video detailing the abuse, she speaks about her family having reacted after he “held me captive in a truck for five days”. “My father filed a police case against him. But he pleaded and asked me to save him… and I did.” She also alleges extramarital affairs, saying that his family “did not say anything… in turn enabling the violence”.
The video was shared on Instagram by The Kaur Movement, an organisation that works for sexual and domestic abuse victims, focusing on the Sikh community. Clips were shared on Twitter on Facebook, too, by several people, who commented on “family and social structure”.
Larger questions figure among angry reactions online and offline. Protesters demanding justice gathered outside her home in New York’s Richmond Hill. Some activists from Punjab went and met her family in Bijnor too. On Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, people from several countries — Sikh and Punjabi diaspora, in particular — used the hashtag #JusticeForMandeep. Many posts said society had failed her.
Rajya Sabha member from Punjab, AAP’s Raghav Chadha, said in a tweet: “I have sought time from Minister [for] External Affairs to seek his timely intervention.”
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UK-based NGO Sikh Women’s Aid, which also works against abuse within the Sikh and Punjabi communities, issued a statement expressing grief: “She describes a life of abuse, belittling and violence.”
Also Read: Gujarat: 28 Per Cent Spike In Domestic Violence Cases In One Year; Ahmedabad, Surat Register Highest
