You have likely heard someone say, “I had so much freedom when I was single, but everything is different now that I am married with kids.” For many, as relationships evolve and families grow, self-care often takes a backseat. The needs and happiness of others become the priority, sometimes at the cost of the things that once brought personal joy. One of the first things to be sacrificed is often solo travel.
This issue is made more difficult by society’s views. If you mention the idea of travelling alone after marriage or children, you will likely face raised eyebrows and unsolicited judgments.
“How can you have fun alone?” or “Won’t you feel guilty leaving your kids behind?” These are just a few of the critical questions people have to deal with.
But take a moment to reflect: Are you holding yourself back because of society’s expectations or your concerns about how your family will manage without you? If so, it’s time to reconsider your priorities.
Neglecting your passions—especially something as fulfilling as solo travel—can have a negative impact on your mental well-being. Ignoring what makes you happy can also strain your relationships over time.
In many Indian homes, when a young woman asks her parents for permission to go on a trip with her college friends or travel solo to a place like Himachal Pradesh, the response is often: “You can travel wherever you want after marriage, not before!”
Then, after marriage, when she has a “permanent travel companion” for life, when does she get the chance to explore the world on her own?
Women, in particular, often feel that they must give up their dreams and hobbies after marriage. But solo travel is a rewarding experience for everyone, regardless of relationship status, gender or profession—and experts highly recommend it.
Experts Speak
Absy Sam, a counselling psychologist from Mumbai, shares with a section of media that solo travel helps individuals discover their preferences, dislikes and life goals. It fosters independence and freedom, both of which are crucial for personal growth.
“In India, where societal norms emphasise collective living, marriage and relationships are often seen as responsibilities. A solo trip, therefore, is a form of self-care, allowing you to nurture your individuality while still being a partner,” she explains.
Ruchi Ruuh, a relationship counsellor in Delhi, adds that solo travel is crucial for maintaining a sense of self in relationships, which helps keep the dynamic healthy.
“Healthy relationships are built on ‘differentiation’—celebrating individuality while being a couple. Solo travel helps people understand themselves better, which enhances their relationships,” she noted.
Solo travel can be a game-changer for mental health. It breaks the routine, reduces stress and gives you a new perspective on life.
Sam emphasizes that solo travel can be especially empowering for women in India, helping them reclaim control over their lives. “It is about gaining independence and self-reliance, which boosts confidence and empowerment,” she says.
Going on a solo trip does not weaken your relationship; in fact, it strengthens it. “Solo travel challenges both partners to respect each other’s need for independence, while also deepening the sense of security within the relationship,” says Ruuh.
Sam adds that solo trips provide essential “me time,” which nurtures emotional health. Understanding and respecting personal space ultimately strengthens the relationship. However, not all partners are comfortable with solo travel. Sam advises open and honest communication about the reasons for the trip and its benefits.
“Some partners may be resistant due to insecurities or fear of losing control. It’s important to address these concerns with empathy and understanding to maintain trust,” she advises.
Having children doesn’t mean you have to give up on solo travel. Ruuh suggests involving family members or hiring help to manage things during your absence and starting with shorter and nearby trips.
Sam believes that solo travel sets an important example for children by showing them the value of self-care. “When parents take time for themselves, they return rejuvenated and better equipped to handle family responsibilities,” she says.
Four Essentials
Balancing solo trips with vacations requires planning. Ruuh and Sam share these helpful tips:
– Plan ahead: Alternate between solo trips and vacations as a couple.
– Budget wisely: Ensure your finances allow for both solo and couple trips.
– Stay connected: Share pictures and updates while travelling.
– Communicate expectations: Be clear about how often you plan to take solo trips and their purpose.
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